During the news coverage of one of the recent marches, I noticed a young man with a sign that read, “Blink, Melania, if you need help.” It was something I myself often have thought about every time I’ve seen her in public with her husband, because there is no doubt in my mind that he is an abuser. He has been abusing his power, his position and the American people even before he stepped into the Oval Office. And he has surrounded himself with people who have enabled him to become the Ultimate Abuser in Chief.
In a previous post on Bullies, I wrote about my feelings regarding enablers. The jeering, cheering throng that goads a bully on making the victim feel even more defenseless and abandoned .
This is what many Citizens of the United States have been experiencing lately. Some days we just want to close off all media and hide. But on a positive note, this is essentially what is uniting these citizens. This gives me cause for hope.
For some people, the Presidency and the country is akin to a family. At this low point in our history, we certainly are a dysfunctional family – much like those families dealing with an unstable, alcoholic parent who, when sober, appears caring and nurturing, but when inebriated is mean and unpredictable.
Some people identify the term “abuse” only with physical or sexual abuse. The abuse I’m discussing is the mental and emotional abuse that comes as a result of being constantly lied to and kept in a continual state of confusion – Blurring the lines of what is truth and what is fact. Erasing the clarity of what is real and what is fake. Insisting that those around you blindly agree with you and conform to your reality. Making your wants and needs the priority. Punishing those who aren’t complicit or subservient to your demands. Keeping everyone on edge awaiting the ax to fall. Annihilating Trust. These are all the methods of an autocratic, abusive personality. This is the mental and emotional abuse we have been subjected to for the past 110 days.
And so, like family members, we sit around awaiting the next sucker punch we know is going to be delivered (not unlike the one former FBI Head James Comey took on Tuesday). We anxiously wait not knowing when the punch will come or how debilitating it will be. And we hope someone will help us off this tight rope we walk every day. We hope someone with influence or power will step in and offer a hand to help. And we tiptoe amidst the land mines set by our abuser. We wait, we cope and we adapt like a frog finding itself in a beaker of water coming increasingly closer to the boiling point. The frog has been given the survival instincts of jumping out of the water or adapting to the temperature. And so, it chooses to adapt each time the temperature under the beaker rises. Ultimately, it forgets it has the ability to jump out and boils to death.
At this moment in time, we appear to be adapting to each fresh pile of chaos being dumped on us. We are adapting to the water in the beaker as it gets hotter and hotter. Unfortunately, we can’t choose to jump out because, you see, there is a hand covering the beaker. It is the hand of everyone choosing to enable this abuser; the hand of the racist haters; the hand of the republican politicians; the hand of the gullible followers who still don’t get it. It is the hand of the CEO’s and big businesses making their profits off the middle class; the Pharma groups who take advantage of people needing insurance and medical treatment and medicine. It’s the pale, bloated hand of rich old men who feel they are entitled to place their financial interests ahead of the welfare of this country.
In conversations with friends and chats on social media, I’ve expressed my view that this country needs to go through all of this dysfunction in order to get to a healthier place. I contend that this is the best civics lesson we could ever receive. A tough love course in Government 101. We allowed this buffoon and his buddies to jump in and take full advantage of our complacency and naïveté. We allowed an illiterate, crass, wannabe-Putin, with Russian financial ties, to walk into the White House and then open its doors to other bullies like Vladimir Putin and Kim Jong Un.
I’ve stated often that in January I truly thought we were on the verge of giving this country away and then came the day after the Inauguration when women stepped forward and the light at the end of the tunnel came into view. And if you look hard, you can see it in the distance. It’s there.
There are Pulitzers and Nobel Peace Prizes and accolades to be had for the journalists and the citizens working to voice their concerns tirelessly to eventually get the truth out in the open. The states attorneys general and members of the judiciary are stepping forward. I’m seeing level-headed leaders speaking out in the Senate and House of Representatives. Their voices are encouraging and they are filling in the gaps. There are elections on the horizon, ripe for the taking by people who value democracy and understand the repercussions of allowing it to be usurped by a narcissistic psychopath and his enablers. And there are the women.
Over 11,000 women already have declared they are going to run for office. When they win, the real difference will become evident, because many women think and act differently than their male counterparts. They often place others first. They usually get more done in an hour than a man does in a week. They are more insightful and if given a chance, will work twice as hard to accomplish a goal than any man on the team. That’s a fact! And if you think I’m biased, you’re absolutely right. And here’s a piece of advice – Never piss a woman off! The Pandora’s box that buffoon has opened will never be closed. Mark my words!
Charley and I have had many political discussions about what could happen and invariably he is pessimistic about what we will be able to do about the buffoon. Other men have voiced the same pessimism. I, however, am confident that the truth will come out and Trump will be tried and possibly found guilty of treason. Other women I’ve spoken with and listened to feel the same way with the caveat: “If someone doesn’t do him in first.”
This has been a true wake-up call for the United States of America. It is our chance to show we are not like the ugly Americans who value money over everything else. We are not like the ugly American who churlishly refused to shake hands with the visiting German Chancellor and abruptly hung up the phone during his first call with the Australian Prime Minister. We are not like the ugly American who lacks respect for individual differences, for the freedom of religion and freedom of the press. We are so much better than that.
We care about others and want to live in a country that cares for its most vulnerable and provides sanctuary for the oppressed. We want leaders with values we can be proud of when they represent us. We appall the ignorance so blatantly flaunted in rediculous tweets, hasty acts, and poorly researched speeches full of false facts.
I have no idea who will finally come forward to begin to repair the damage being done to our democracy. I don’t know what will finally precipitate the change. Will there be cause for impeachment when the Russian investigations are concluded? Will the buffoon finally extract enough money and profits from his position and decide to resign and walk away with his ill-gotten riches? Will one of his followers suddenly realize he/she has been duped and decide to take matters into his/her own hands? Many of his followers will have much to be embittered about in the future and they are not the kind to take a public betrayal in stride. They have guns and know how to use them. I think by purposefully lying to them for his own gain, he’s played a very dangerous game.
He’s fired US Attorney Preet Bharara, Attorney General Sally Yates, numerous state department officials with vast stores of invaluable experience and history. He’s installed millionaires into key positions with little or no experience in their fields. He has not properly vetted many of those incompetents and some have already proven to be people we wouldn’t want anywhere near classified information: Michael Flynn, Paul Manafort, Carter Page and Roger Stone to mention just a few. It’s been an interminable 110 days and it is a wonder the buffoon hasn’t caused a major diplomatic incident with another country. He’s filled our government with toadies bent on helping him make as much money from and cause as much turmoil for our country as possible because that is what Russia wants – to keep our democracies in chaos. Ultimately, we will find out it is exactly what they’ve been paying their puppet to do. They have gotten good return on their million dollar loans and are laughing all the way to the bank. http://www.politico.com/magazine/story/2017/05/10/james-comey-firing-trump-lavrov-putin-215124
In the end, I’m hoping it will be a peaceful transition to a better and wiser USA and that it is precipitated by the underlying truths now being brought to light. I’m hoping there will be a moral at the end of this story and that the plot has a hero/heroine who comes forward and shows all of us all how to speak out against ignorance and obtain justice for all. I’m confident there are many who will come forward as Sally Yates and the students at Bethune-Cookman University did this week. I have hope
But right now I’m sitting here with my eyelids fluttering.
I’m blinking madly.
Lots of us are blinking.
We need help.